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Archive for the ‘opinions’ Category

If it has the word "last" or "remember"... someone definitely kicks the bucket

Let’s face it: when Hollywood finds a cow that produces they milk it until its dead on the ground. Like Nicholas Sparks for instance. This mediocre 44-year-old romance writer has spawned some of the most successful sap-fests in recent Hollywood history. Everyone cried in A Walk to Remember, and The Notebook is notoriously tissue-worthy. But I’m starting to get bored. Super bored, in fact. Miley Cyrus can do that to you…

8 Easy Steps to Writing a Nicholas Sparks Novel

1. There must be young-people in love. Or old-people in love. Or both

2. Society won’t like it. A rich girl and a poor boy? That storyline is brand spankin’ new!

3. Someone needs to die, be dying, or have some sort of incurable disease. This is a big thing for Nick. Seriously, in every single story someone has cancer, autism, dementia… you get the idea.

4. There must be an old house. It has a lot of history, and it might even be a fixer-upper. What a great thing to spend your dying days doing.

5. Someone needs to lose their virginity. Preferably the young-people in love.

6. It helps if in the film version, you cast a well-known pop sensation or American Sweetheart. It also helps if their names start with M. (Mandy Moore, Miley Cyrus, Rachel McAdams)

7. Beaches must be present and key parts of the story (if you’re curious which books this is true for… its every single one).

8. Similar to the need for beaches in is the need for Carnivals. These are, apparently, the most romantic places in the world. In my experience toothless carnies spitting tobacco on you isn’t really that romantic, but to each his own.

9. Letters, journals, etc should be written in copious amounts and left in bottles or in …. notebooks maybe? Or in songs? Last Songs perhaps?

See, now we can save poor Nick some time and write our very own novels for Hollywood to rip off and make millions off of.

Get crackin’, readers!

Well, the Vancouver 2010 Olympics are over, but the memories will live on for Canadians for a long time to come. Not only did we break records, but we had some truly amazing moments. Read on for this Canadian Girl’s countdown of the best moments of these Olympic Games.
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Roger Ebert is my hero.

He has been for many years, in fact, since I watched him review films on Ebert and Roeper as a teen. I wanted to be like him, a critic. I was lucky enough to actually live that dream a little in my short life, but no one can even touch Ebert when it comes to professional accomplishments. He has published countless books, received several honours, changed the world of film criticism forever, and inspired generations to love movies again. But now, he is facing a fight for his life. A fight which has cost him something he is perhaps best known for (except his thumbs perhaps): his voice.

Roger Ebert on the cover of Esquire


The idea is horrifying: a critic literally losing his voice. However, Ebert is everything but silenced. His voice, while audibly absent still lives on in his writing. RogertEbert.com features up-to-date reviews of recent films, and he is also a featured columnist for the Sun Times. Ebert recently exhibited the utmost bravery in revealing to the world his face for an interview in Esquire.

Some might call it monstrous, others might call it honest, but it is nonetheless the reality for Ebert now. He speaks through a computer, and through notes he writes. Supported by his wife Chaz, Ebert remains a very key member of the film world.

Many say Ebert is dying; he prefers to think of things more optimistically. While his time with us may be limited, his impact is not. His passions, and opinions, will live on forever in his writing, his television series’, and his trademarked “thumbs up”.

Literally, I was awoken last night by a nightmare of epic proportions-

I was on… THE JERSEY SHORE.

The cast of MTV's "Jersey Shore"

Sweet God it was terrifying. There was self-tanner, big hair and disgusting sexual escapades. Perhaps what was most terrifying was the knowledge that this was anything but a figment of my imagination: it’s a show on MTV.

Don’t watch this show. I watched one episode (ONE!) and I felt my brain matter start to boil and run out my ear.

The cast is an array of New Jersey guido and guidette stereotypes. Their names are as ridiculous as they appearance: Snooki, The Situation, Sammi Sweetheart, J-Woww, Pauly D, and the two normal-named ones Ronnie and Vinny. The only real pleasure can be found by watching the borderline-midget Snooki get socked in the jaw. I am a firm advocate for women’s rights, and this guy should not have punched her, but it feels so good to watch.

Also, people are pissed about the stereotype that they’re supporting. But MTV isn’t really in the wrong here: these people are obviously caricatures. I have a feeling most viewers will recognize that there can’t be an entire state of people this idiotic in existence, or there would be at the very least a high occurence of melanoma. Not to mention, I’m sure their state test scores would be alarming.

For a giggle, check out Alyssa Milano transforming herself  into a Jersey Shore Clone for Funny or Die.

And you thought The Hills was bad…

An example of the "burqa" head scarf

Most are familiar with the “burqa“, a full head covering worn by some Muslim women.  It is seen mainly in the Middle East, but many immigrants or Muslim people in other countries also continue to practice the tradition. Not to be confused with the head scarf “hijab“, the burqa covers everything except for the eyes.

Unfortunately, the tradition has become much harder to follow for many Muslims living in France.

France has recently begun the process of banning the burqa from being worn in many public service areas (i.e. the bus, government offices, etc), even threatening to refuse services to women who are wearing it. This appears to be an effort to curb what many believe is a sexist practice, as well as to make sure that people are required to show there faces in places such as the passport office.

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Don’t you hate it when people say “What? You haven’t seen (insert famous movie here)???”

Well, some of them aren’t that great, and are skippable (as long as you’re not in film school), but some are really can’t miss classics, or just amazing films. Here’s a shortlist for you to work on this new year. In chronological order, but with little rhyme or reason- I just love them. If you guys like this top 10, maybe I’ll make a habit of it with different themes.
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Fashion magazines, Marie Claire included, tend to focus their eyes on what I call the skinny-bitches- size 0-4. I have never fit into a size 0… I’m pretty sure I came out of the womb plus sized… although I was usually taller than anything before my height caught up with my weight.

At any rate, sometimes (many times) I just give up when it comes to fashion. Not that I don’t have an eye for it, and love it, but I get frustrated with the “plus sized” options available to me. Plus, it’s really disheartening to see something you love in a magazine, only to realize that it’s from a store than can’t count higher than 12… and even then it’s pushing it.

Ashley Falcon at a Fashion Event this year

My saviour has been found in Ashley Falcon, former Marie Claire fashion intern turned columnist/blogger for the bestselling mag. The catch? She’s the same size as me (18… I can’t believe I’m typing that out for the world to see!). Ashley is not only a great writer and great dresser, but she’s brave. She is unashamed about her size and not afraid to admit where she gets her clothes.

She admits to attending upscale fashion shows wearing a pair of jeans from Old Navy and a t-shirt from (gasp!) Wal-Mart. If it fits and looks good, then you should wear it, label be damned!

Not just a one-shot article, Marie Claire took a risk and made her a regular columnist and blogger on their website (check it out here). The “Big Girl in a Skinny World” was also featured in the Ottawa Citizen, and I was so excited to find it there one morning! There is hope for us curvier girls; we can be chic too!